Adevaruri fundamentale
BARBATUL
Ce bea la:
17 ani: bere
25 ani: bourbon
35 ani: vodka
48 ani: vodka dubla
66 ani: dicarbocalm
Ce spune cand vrea sa agate:
17 ani: Parintii sunt plecati in week-end
25 ani: Prietena e plecata in week-end
35 ani: Logodnica e plecata in week-end
48 ani: Nevasta e plecat...
Cică era o mare reuniune mare la palatul Buckingham, cu tot soiul de nobili şi capete încoronate. Şi se nimereşte din greşeală şi nea Băse p-acolo. Încep prezentările:
"Maiestatea sa regina Elisabeta a II-a a Marii Britanii şi Irlandei de Nord, din...
Bill Gates e judecat pentru bigamie.
El spune:
-Daca traiesti cu doua femei nu inseamna bigamie, inseamna multitasking....
O veverita si-o tragea cu-o nuca. Vine alta veverita:
- Are you fucking crazy?
- No, I`m fucking nuts! ...
Formula 1 Breaking News: Seful echipei de Formula 1 Ferrari si-a concediat tehnicienii si in locul lor a angajat tigani din Romania pentru ca scot rotile de 3 ori mai repede.Mai tarziu i-a parut rau.E drept ca fata de timpul obisnuit desfaceau rotile in 3 secunde insa in cele 7 secunde ramase au rev...
Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better fucking do what Chuck Norris says.
Q: Care e asemanarea dintre o blonda si UNIX?
A: Amindoua sint multi-tasking si multi-user.
When Chuck Norris answers the phone, he just says ``Go``. This is not permission for you to begin speaking, it is your cue to start running for your life.
Vin Diesel is currently working an internship with the Frank Gehry architecture partnership, he intends to play a key role in the design of the new King Alfred Swimming Pool complex in Brighton, England. On the opening night of the project he will secret
The greatest trick Vin Diesel ever pulled was making the world think he doesn`t exist.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it`s fucking beef.
Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.
Vin Diesel killed and devoured Mufasa from The Lion King, but let the hyenas live becasue they were quote ``dirty creatures``.
The most honorable way of dying is taking a bullet for Chuck Norris. This amuses Chuck Norris because he is bulletproof.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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