Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.
Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better fucking do what Chuck Norris says.
Chuck Norris doesn`t need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way.
Chuck Norris can create a rock so heavy that even he can`t lift it. And then he lifts it anyways, just to show you who the fuck Chuck Norris is.
Chuck Norris is always on top during sex because Chuck Norris never fucks up.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it`s fucking beef.
Chuck Norris is 1-8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.