Un tip sta în Danny’s Bar, la aeroportul Changi din Singapore si observa o femeie foarte atragatoare la masa de lânga el. E atât de frumoasa, ca trebuie sa fie însotitoare de zbor, îsi spune. Dar pentru ce companie o lucra?
Ca sa intre în vorba, se întoarce catre ea si-i sopteste sloganul D...

Doi elevi termina gimnaziul si unul intra la informatica, altul la auto. Peste 50 de ani se intilnesc.
Cel de la auto:
- Ma, eu am facut masini superbeton, viteza maxima, etc.
Cel de la informatica:
- Ma, eu am firma de calculatoare mare… si sa stii ca daca faceam eu masini erau de 10 ori mai bune...

I want you!
I dream you!
I need you!
I f*ck you!
I vrea tu!

Let's be friends.
I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's that male perspective thing.

My life is too complicated right now.
I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.

There's a slight difference in our ages.
I don't want to do my dad.

It is impossible to be raped by Chuck Norris because that would mean you did not want it to happen.

Chuck Norris doesn`t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.