I don't date men where I work.
I wouldn't date you if you were in the same "solar system", much less the same building.

Vin Diesel was the culprit who ate Gilbert Grape. He would later describe the experience as ``Similar in texture to panda meat , but not without its charms.``

Dan Brown was originally going to call his book ``The Da Vin Diesel Code`` but decided that would give the game away too much.

Vin Diesel created the idea for the game of soccer when he would fly a

Vin Diesel tried to start a business where he would recharge batteries simply by gripping them in his hands.

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice announced that it would be possible to fight two wars at once. Incidentally, Vin Diesel announced that he could fight two whores at once.

It is impossible to be raped by Chuck Norris because that would mean you did not want it to happen.

Chuck Norris was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, ``Only a pussy would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelery.``

The only reason Chuck Norris didn`t win an Oscar for his performance in ``Sidekicks`` is because nobody in their right mind would willingly give Chuck Norris a blunt metal object. That`s just suicide.